“Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit.” Proverbs 18:21
Your brain is programmed through language; it encodes thoughts and feelings through words, to create an abstract internal representation of everything that is “out there” in the world. This representation makes up your internal mapping. Your maps are constructed from how you perceive, interpret, respond to, and interact with reality or the territory. This map resides in your nervous system and is made up of life experiences, memories, beliefs, associations, thoughts, feelings which you encode and decode with words.
Why is this important? Because you navigate via this interface with reality. The richer your map, the more accurate, adequate, and useful it is, and the more choices you have. The more impoverished your map/model, the fewer options you have. An inaccurate, or outdated map will not get you to where you want to go. If the roads (options or possibilities) do not show in your map, then they don’t exist to you at all. Most of your problems occur because you are operating from an impoverished or distorted map.
What does this have to do with your words?
Your language plays a critical role in the quality of your maps and how you programme yourself. This is why the limitations of your language are the limitations of your world. Your existence and experience can be no richer than the words you have for describing it. Words enable your thinking as well as constrain your thinking. Without sufficiently rich or colourful words to describe your experience, emotions, and ideas, you won’t be able to express yourself accurately. If you cannot make a distinction with words, you cannot make it theoretically.
Most of the time you think in words and with words. Language is a vital part of your representational system. You use words to encode internally, what you experience externally. And then to decode and share what you sense, think, and feel internally, with someone else externally. We use words to communicate with each other. Words are used to transfer your thoughts, ideas, and emotions. You put your thoughts into words, and then you transfer the words to someone, hoping that they will understand what you mean. We aim to construct meaning with our words, but the meaning is not inherent in the words. The meaning is not in the word, but in your association with the word. The meanings are in us. We are meaning makers and use words to construct meaning.
Words are symbols that refer to something else. Words are not things, and they are not real. Although we often treat them as real. The word “gun” cannot shoot you, just like the word “meal” cannot satisfy you. Words like hatred, violence, discrimination, etc. evoke a response. Yet, they are just words. Words cannot hurt you, yet some people will try to use them as weapons. Verbal abuse will affect you only to the degree that you believe the words.
If you believe words, then you give them power. You activate the words and ideas in your nervous system by believing them. Then they have the power to affect you. If you add a strong sense of confirmation to your words and thoughts, then they become commands you send to your nervous system. This is how you encode your software, or program yourself.
If you believe it, you make it real in your experience. What your mid-body system does with the words, depends on whether you just think it or whether you believe it. Beliefs are principles of conduct and have been proven to influence your biology. This has been clearly demonstrated with the placebo and nocebo effect. If you believe a supplement or medication will work, you are likely to experience it as effective. If you believe your doctor’s prediction about your condition, your outcome will likely go in that direction.
If someone (a parent, teacher, boss, or partner) has spoken words over you, and you believe it, it will probably be realized in your experience. If you believe a lie, then your perception and representation of reality will be distorted. Your map will not accurately represent the territory and you will experience frustration or pain.
Words can bring life; empower, inspire, equip, and enlighten. At the same time words can bring death; dis-empower, corrupt, intoxicate, limit, and diminish.
Words and phrases are after all just letters and syllables slapped together, until you give them meaning.
Choose the words you believe and choose the words you use wisely.
About the author: Reinhard Korb is a Meta-coach and integrates neuroscience, neuro-semantics, psychology, and lifestyle for optimal health, performance, engagement and productivity. As the founder of Keep Thriving, he has facilitated and helped organisations and individuals actualize their potential.
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